Things I Do Need To Do: Date My Husband

As I begin to eliminate things from my “to-do list,” I am making decisions about what to prioritize.  There are some tasks that must remain on the list, despite my reticence to complete them.  Anyone want to come clean out my entry way closet?  Fortunately, dating my husband is an item that I am more than happy to keep on my list.  Hubby and I have been married close to five years and, so far, have had a pretty good go of it.  I LOVE this man.  He is everything a good husband should be.  I’ve never met anyone more selfless and giving and it’s a pleasure to spend each day with him. 

We are fortunate to have abundant, free child care options.  My daughter is the only grandchild on either side and we have six local grandparents.  Let’s do the math, shall we? 

Six local grandparents + one wee one + seven days a week = not enough child to go around. 

We know how blessed we are.  Despite this, it can still be challenging to find time together.  However, the Friday after Thanksgiving has always been special to us.  We went on our very first date six years ago today.  We went to dinner and saw “Walk the Line.”  My husband didn’t know who Johnny Cash was prior to seeing it, but that’s a story for another day.   We were married a year and a half later and have made it our tradition to see a movie on the Friday after Thanksgiving ever since.  We’ve screened everything from “Happy Feet” to “Casino Royale.”   

This year, we’re tired.  Yes, friends, just plain tired.  We rarely get to relax together at home.  And so, we concocted a plan.  The wee one will spend the afternoon/evening with grandparents.  We’ll spend the afternoon/evening on our couch, watching “Field of Dreams” and eating this…

Oh, yes.  Best Ben and Jerry’s Flavor ever. 

The movie was free at our local library and the ice cream, a big splurge for us, cost somewhere in the neighborhood of $4.00.  A simple, inexpensive, lovely date.  My cup runneth over.    

Things I Don't Need To Do: Post Pictures Of My Daughter Online

This post may meet with some disagreement.  I'm okay with that, because I've considered this issue carefully.  As I continue this blog, I intend to learn more about blogging and add some bells and whistles.  In other words, I might actually figure out what I'm doing when it comes to design and visual interest. However, you won't ever see clear facial shots of my daughter.  I understand that photos add a great deal to a blog.  They're interesting and keep us connected to the author of the blog.  They make the author seem real.  I plan to add photos and lots of them, but not of my daughter and here's why:

Many moons ago, when I was a graduate student in Library and Information Science, one of my professors gave a detailed lesson on how digital photos can be altered.  Apparently, in the seedy world of child pornography, new is exciting.  If there are no new photos of children in horrifically compromising positions, new ones can be created.  Anyone who wanted to could copy a photo of my daughter from my blog, alter it and put her face on a different photo-- one in which a child is being abused.  No thank you.

I've been in some discussions about this issue on other blogs and was told by a blogger that anyone could take a photo of her child in public without her knowledge and do the same thing.  The blogger used this as justification for posting photos on her site.  Fine, have at it.  I know that I can't control everything that happens to my child. However, there's a big difference between someone secretly photographing my child and me posting photos galore for the taking. 

I think that blogger sometimes feel protected because "not that many people know about the blog" or it's for "family only."  Check out this post on Want What You Have, one of my favorite blogs.  People are out there looking for pictures of children.  Heather, the author of this blog, has found an approach for dealing with those seeking inappropriate pictures of children.  I respect and admire her a great deal and offer her solution to those of you who prefer to post family photos.  I have just decided that I will not take any chances with photographs of my daughter.   No offense to anyone.  Please make your own decisions.  I'm pretty clear about the one I've made. 

Things I Don't Need To Do: Read So Many Blogs

I like to read blogs.  A lot.  Marked in my favorites, I had somewhere between ten and fifteen that I was checking regularly (um, yeah, that means daily).  Of course, I could have subscribed to them and gotten notifcation when something new was posted.  But, no, I didn't do that.  I just ran through them in moments I stole from my family.  This makes little sense coming from someone who just started a blog, but I cut them down drastically.  Here's why:

1.  The blogs were a huge waste of time.  I read them when I truly should have been doing other things. 

2.  The blogs made me feel inadequate. 
Now, let me be clear.  This is, in most cases, not the fault of the writers of these blogs.  Each one focused on a different topic such as home management, home decor, crafting, preschool education, and more.  Because I read them all I started feeling like I needed to be more accomplised in each of these areas.  Again, I say, not the fault of the blog authors.  However, I do think there is a tendency for all of us to present only the best of ourselves.  I think most of us need to work on sharing our warts a little bit more.  That's why I'm going to show you a picture of the inside of my microwave.  Well, maybe someday. 

3.  Blogs are a form of virtual reality.  I used them to feel connected to others, but I wasn't truly connecting to anyone.  I was just taking myself out of my own reality for a little while. 

So, I made some cuts.  Now, I read three blogs out of personal interest.  They are: Passionate Homemaking and Want What You Have.  Though quite different, they both speak to the challenges and blessings of simple, intentional homemaking.  I enjoy my friend Annette's Blog:  Live, Learn, Love and every time I read it I'm grateful that I know her personally.  I also subscribe to two education/homeschool blogs that help me find ideas for my two-year-old.  I just keep an eye on them for quick and easy activities. 

Occasionally, I find myself wandering on to a new blog and toying with the idea of adding it to my collection.  But, for now, I'm staying strong and eliminating some time not-so-well-spent from my day.  Now, if only I could wean myself from Pinterest.  Sigh.

How about you?  What could you give up that would ultimately make you feel saner and more focused?

Things I Don't Need To Do

Yesterday, as I was leaving Bible Study, I stopped to chat with my friend Ruth as she was leaving the parking lot.  She expressed an interest in having a craft night again in the near future and apologized for not scheduling one sooner, saying things had been crazy.  I sighed with agreement.  I was also feeling overwhelmed.  She admitted to having a "major meltdown" the week before and I opined that I felt like I was on the verge of the same thing.  So it seems are most of the women I know.  "Something has to give." I said.  And it does.  And it will.  I went home and thought about all the things I have on my "to-do" list, those things that rattle around in my mind constantly-- when I am playing with my child, trying to sleep at night, half listening to the sermon on Sunday.  So I decided to compile a list of my to-do lists.  I have several:  Today's To-Do List, The Short Term Project To-Do List, The Long-Term To Do List, The Floating Around In My Mind List.  Here's what I found:
1.  Cull magazines, cut out dog-eared articles and file in "Idea File"
2.  Organize Idea File
3.  Put away Halloween decorations
4.  Put up Thanksgiving decorations
5.  Prepare strawberries in garden for winter
6.  Make some freezer meals
7.  Organize hall closet
8.  Make a snack drawer for D.D.
9.  Put a hook in the hall closet for D.D. to use
10.  Clean and organize garage
11.  Clean and organize basement
12.  Update October finance spreadsheet
13.  Write a check for the painter
14.  Finish pajama bag for D.D.
15.  Finish crocheting blanket for friend's baby
16.  Clean out cabinets for painting
17.  Make calendar/schedule for D.D.
18.  Schedule date with Hubs
19.  Move summer clothes to basement
20.  Schedule meal for friends with new baby
21.  Clean at Mom's house
22.  Plan gifts for Christmas and fall birthdays
23.  Catch up on return phone calls
24.  E-mail local youth center about volunteer opportunities
25.  Shave legs
26.  Read book group book
27.  Schedule haircut
28.  Schedule brow wax
29.  Make priority list of books to read
30.  Organize freezer
31.  Organize refrigerator
32.  Make playdough
33.  Go to dollar store
34.  Learn to digital scrapbook
35.  Straighten desk
36.  Start a daily devotional time with D.D.
37.  Learn how to can
38.  Make a cereal box organizer
39.  Undertake a scripture memorization program
40.  Start wearing make-up on a more regular basis/ditch make-up altogether (depends on the day)
41.  Clean out the microwave (Really, really gross.  I seriously considered adding a picture.  Really, really gross). 
42.  Pin new items to Pinterest.  (Hi, everyone, my name is Kate and I am an addict.)
43.  Lose 10-15 pounds
44.  Encourage my husband more
45.  Serve more veggies to my family
46.  Post items for sale on Craigslist
47.  Learn to make pie crust.
48.  Hang curtains in bedroom
49.  Any one of the 400 and some items on my Pinterest Boards

Okay, there's more, a lot more, but you get the picture.  And I just decided to stop.  It's time to stop doing so much and start being more.  So begins this blog, dedicated to chronicling my attempts to determine the things I don't need to do.  In the process, I endeavor to reconnect to what Jesus is truly calling me to do.  The first thing to go from the list?  Number 38:  Make a cereal box organizer.  What was I thinking?

-Kate